Fun at the Office

Bored? Try some of these tips to make your office more enjoyable!

• When the phone rings, answer by saying 'KBBL, you're on the air.'
• Follow a few paces behind someone, spraying everything they touch with a can of Lysol.
• Finish all your sentences with the words "in accordance with prophesy."
• Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice
• Every time someone asks you to do something, anything, ask them if they want fries with that.
• When someone says "have a nice day", tell them you have other plans.
• Send out a notice saying that you have a brain tumor. After everyone in your office sends flowers and presents, send out another note telling everyone that it was not a brain tumor but just a bad headache.
• Put your garbage can on your desk. Label it "IN."
• Make up nicknames for all your coworkers and refer to them only by these names. "That's a good point, Sparky." "No I'm sorry I'm going to have to disagree with you there, Chachi."
• Insist that your e-mail address be "xena_goddess_of_fire@companyname.com"
• At lunch time, sit in your parked car w/sunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.
• As often as possible, skip rather than walk.
• Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their party because you're not in the mood.
• When the money comes out of the ATM, scream "I Won! I Won! Third time this week!!!"
• Make beeping noises when a large person backs up.
• Signal that a conversation is over by clamping your hands over your ears.
• Adjust the tint on your computer screen so that all the people are green, and insist to others that you "like it that way."
• Ask people what gender they are.
• Lick the filling out of all the Oreos, and place the cookie parts back in the tray.
• Take a picture of your boss and have it framed. Display it in a prominent location on your desk.
• Whenever a fellow staff member sneezes, quickly yell "SHUT UP!" If they sneeze a second time, follow up with "I SAID SHUT UP!". A third time, leave the room crying while saying "NO ONE EVER LISTENS TO ME!".
• Staple papers in the centre of the page.
• While making presentations, occasionally bob your head like a parakeet.
• Ask your co-workers mysterious questions and then scribble their answers in a notebook. Mutter something about "psychological profiles."
• Pretend your computers mouse is a CB radio, and talk to it.
  

Have fun!